The eternal undead amaranth
Sunday, July 02, 2006
I am not feeling very well today. Fever is gone, but i still have a bad giddiness in my head. I spammed my friend like hell while he was afk. Imagining his ace when he realises it gives mea laugh.

Anyway, on 3oth june 2006, i gave her (mom )a sheet stating how much i wanted for allowance, like she requested.
"You want allowance for what? You want allowance write down on a piece of paper then show it to me."

So i did. Here are its exact contents:

1 Mth 30 days:

$6 per day for food.(Lunch & dinner)(recess is paid by cashcard)
$o.5o per day (to take bus home)
( my parents always pretend to say take bus yrself to sch but every morn say, come a fetch you to sch.)
$1 per week (bus fare to tuition and back.)
$2 emergency money per week.
$1 per day for drinks

Total: $237

Then +$13 for savings(or other reasons) (and to make it a round number)

$250 per month

She did not think it was too much a number but, she simply said, :"i still prefer that when u need money you ask me".

She just doesnt want me to have savings so that i can buy my own things and all! That times (twice) i wanted to catch a movie, she kept asking the trademark Mother question:" Are u asking my permission or informing me that you are going out."

Frankly, it did seem like a dead end question. I was pissed, so i answered :" No, i am telling you i want to go out but you won't open the door." The 'open the door' thing is a metaphor to ' you dun want me to go out therefore you wont give me money.' Now that was kinda dead end for her so i managed to go out.

Maybe it was punishment for being rude as i fell sick soon after.

Also, I was thinking. Father Francis Lee (a priest) once said that after you die u are given a choice to go heaven or hell. It is like a road of trials. then, in mass today, i thought maybe it was a choice, where the angel asks you, :'' God wants to to turn to good. Will you puriy yourself of evil in the place of reluctant turning (turning of your soul), or will you continue on in the pleasures of greed and evil? This place is the land of all greed and pleasures that you will want in the world. But beware, those not of good will be punished by God in hell. Turning back to God and repenting is the only way to salvation. God's Divine Justice will ensure your eternal sufering in deviating from Him. Repentant you must be"

Frankly, i had imagined the angel saying it.

Ah, just a thought. Also, can all who came here, especially when you dun come often, tag pls? S that i know who came.

undead withering eternal

Undead, withering and eternal
Shadow submerged
Torn and separated
young mind of 20
decaying youth
will this night ever end

Inner lusts
to waltz in crimson rain, the masquerade
for the night to last forever
never see the light of day

Into the light
[x] Felix Kyros Ang,my best friend, whose loyalty lies above all.
[x] Perry Peter Yeo, my favourite and loving cousin
[x] Darth Sulphate, who calls herself 'Azuire'
[x] Sarah, a wonderful friend that departed from SRJC
[x] Meryl, Podium member thats been there, done that
[x] Leryee, an online friend
[x] Podium Blog
[x] Dog Union '07
[x] Joyce, SRJC Debate Captain 2007
[x] John an emo prawn

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